Our good friends, Justin & Trisha, at RefineUs.org have created a new program and opportunity for couples who need some guidance in their marital journey. Brian and I are fortunate enough to get to be a part of this new opportunity.
One of the best things Brian and I did post-confession of my affair was seek counseling AND coaching. The biggest mistake we can make is believe we can do all this on our own. So, I urge you… go check THIS out.
PLUS… maybe you could win something awesome in the process.
Help us get the word out!!!
… Because every single one of us is worth fighting for.
So glad to have found this blog & a few others as well. Only 5 months ago my world was rocked by my own husbands infidelity with a woman I was becoming so incredibly close to! She is also married w/ 4 boys. Me, 2 girls w/ my husband. I was away w/ our 2 girls for a month & w/in that time he began an emotional connection w/ this other woman which quickly lead to a physical affair.
. We all attended the same church & my husband & I were becoming quite involved at church. Me on admin staff & him in worship. The other woman was a youth leader & my husband became involved w/ that as well. The only reason, I can see, that any confessions were made by either ‘infidel” was because they were found out by fellow church goers, including our pastor. After 3 months of the initial confession, my husband finally seems to be done w/ ‘her’ & wants to rebuild our own marriage together. I pray my husband is truly repentant. He holds grudges toward our beloved church family (we are no longer a part of nor any church at the time) he feels betrayed by many of them & how they handled the whole thing. I don’t completely disagree, but we ALL our human & we ALL fall short of the greatness of God. I have a lot if struggles ahead, obviously. God has recently showed me my own shortcomings. I was fighting wanting to love my husband, & fighting hard. Yet I never had a peace in my heart to take our girls & leave. Many people surrounding us feel I should have left. Some even look down on me for not doing so….. But if God can love me & my stubborn ways & he can take care of me. Then God surely can take care of my marriage & bring us to restoration & allow us to be better than ever in doing so. I know I’m not the only woman out there whose whole entire world was rocked in such a way. Satan is ready to devour any one of us, stay strong & always stay prepared.
I have not many counsel options where we live. So I read books & have found some blogs. Right now I’m reading Cindy Bealls book b/c a good friend stumbled across it & gave it to me. At this time my husband doesn’t think he needs counsel. He is meeting with a fellow believer in Christ once a week, who is a man, & is aware of the infidelity. I pray that God uses this man in my husbands life in ways that will be uplifting, accountable, spirit filled & full of love to show my husband truth. Please pray for me, my husband & our marriage! May we beat the odds against us!! Praise God!!!
oh leah… i am SO sorry about all you had to go through. 5 months is not a very long time ago… and sometimes we feel like because it’s dragging on in our lives… we need to pick ourselves up and “get over it”. i’m pray that’s not where you’re at.
it’s hard to forgive something so unforgivable. it’s equally difficult for the offender who wants to make it right… because honestly… we let down EVERYONE. and if we no longer have (or at least feel like we no longer have) anyone, then we feel we can never recover. how are any of us ever supposed to do life alone?
i would highly recommend you guys TRY out coaching. it could be with us, or with another of the wonderful couples in RefineUs… but it’s amazing how much less alone both of you will feel. sometimes… we just need someone who’s walked that road before us to walk WITH us.
praying for you and your family, leah!