Lynse Stevens is a sweet precious friend of mine.
Here’s a woman who has not only faced every blow life has had to give her head on and said, “You will not decide who I will become!” but she’s turned all of that energy towards flipping all the negative to show God’s amazing grace and love for us. She challenges all who have ever been “damaged” to step up and say, “I don’t have to stay damaged!”
We did a blog swap today so my writing is over there. Make sure you stop by!
You can check out more of her writing on her blog site at www.lynseleanne.com
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Have you ever felt broken?
not like the Godly broken….but like the nitty gritty broken. like you just dont work right. like there is something horribly wrong with you?
i have been spending some time feeling that way lately. i cant really pin point down where or why all of a sudden i feel this way. but it is an overwhelming sense that i am broken.
….but maybe that is a good place to be.
all of my life i have had it together. even through physical and sexual abuse, drug addictions, parents divorce…i have had it in control and i knew it.
but right now in this season i dont have it together…i cant seem to get it together. and because i am a control freak i feel like something is wrong…that i am broken.
but as i spend time in my journal and spend time in the Word i am seeing that this may be a good place to be. It may be rock bottom for me.
weekly facing my demons in counseling…and it hurts.out of money….and daddy cant help this time.without a job…and scared out of my mind cause 5 years of my life was wrapped up in the current one.
and i can not fix any of it….not one single bit of it.
only God can. and that scares me even more….because, frankly i have played a game. I have played Christian because it was my job, cause i knew it was “right”, cause i live in the south and thats what everyone does….but now the rubber meets the road….
do i believe that God can take this mess that I have made of my life and put it back together?
I think He can…in fact…i know He can.
I can completely relate to this! But the Lord ALWAYS knows where we are, no matter how far we try to get from Him, or how much we try to hide from Him. He has a perfect plan for our lives and I know that the Lord will bless your honesty, your integrity and your desire to live for Him!! He is a LOVING God and I have no worries for where you will come out after this because I know the Lord will guide you 100%!!
Thank you for sharing and giving me a little kick in the booty to make sure MY walk with the Lord is in the RIGHT place!!
oh dear Lynse, the Christian game has left me wondering if God can and/or will fix anything that has gone wrong or unbalanced or unfair in my life. it is a lonely feeling but not one you or i should feel alone in. i am right there with you — praying and still trying to trust that He’s got it.
it was in my “rock bottom” that i FINALLY found the peace that is God. it’s weird saying that when i’ve been a Christian most of my life. i love you, lynse… and i think you are SO brave for writing about what is real in your life.
Wow…good post. To say that place of being broken is hard is just not doing the situation justice. I have zero doubt God can put anyone’s life back together…the hard part is waiting when the pieces don’t seem to be moving.
God bless you Jenni.
you are absolutely right, Jason…
oh… and you know Lynse wrote this post right? i wrote over at her place today.
For me, it was about learning that God fixing what is wrong or broken in my life is a sure thing, it just may not look the way I thought it should. Fixing my life may not mean my walk will be easy, but because it’s Him, I know my walk will be worth it.
brOKen
i imagine the word like that often. because i need the reminder that i’m broken, but i’m ok.
i’m broken beyond anything i could repair on my own. i can’t even find all the pieces, let alone begin trying to put them all back together.
i’m clinging to God’s promise of wholeness — nothing missing, nothing broken. because i know His restoration is more than a fix. more than a patch-job. more than a bad crazy-glue repair that leaves all the cracks and chips still visible. His restoration is of the brand-new variety.
and i am SO ready for brand-new.