I love you, Brian…
You’re an amazing father, and there’s no one I’d rather raise our boys with than with you.

Thank you for choosing me…
… for choosing us.

Thank you for all our happy days.

Chance: “My grandma has lots of flowers in her garden.”
David: “Flowers are nice.”
Chance: “Does your grandma have flowers in HER garden?”
David: “She used to, but now she’s in a nursing home.”

WHAT the WHAT???

Good thing David didn’t tell Chance about his OTHER grandmother… who’s with Jesus.

I often find myself speechless to where God has placed me.

In my sins…
In my humiliation…
In my pain…
In my regrets…

… God has renewed me. I deserve death, but instead, I’ve received life.

In grace…
In new beginnings…
In forgiveness…
In community…
In restoration…

I am healed.

My past doesn’t define me. How I choose to live and WHO I choose to live FOR does.

———————-

For those of you who feel “stuck” today, know you’re not alone. Satan’s desire is to have you believe you are. But the truth that is Christ Jesus says you’re not.

Come out. Come out into the light.

It’s much safer out here.

Tam and Brent are good friends of ours. Actually, “friends” isn’t really the best word to describe our relationship with them. They’re more like FAMILY.

For as long as we’ve known them, we’ve known their bed is rubbish. It wasn’t the greatest quality bed to begin with but they had been sleeping on it for way to long.

Long story short, Brian came up with the idea to get them a new one. We couldn’t afford it by ourselves so we called in backup. We contacted a handful of our mutual friends and within 48 hours, enough money had come in not only for the new high-quality bed (that Diane, David and I found at a “ALL-MUST-GO” liquidation sale) but for bedding, new pillows as well.

Thank you, David & Diane, Gitz, Laura & Stephen, Joshua & Ryanne, Nicole, Mark and Cathi, Alece and Crystal for helping Brian and me make this happen. We love you, family!

You can read Tam’s post about it HERE as well.

What was the last gift you were really proud of giving out?

Here’s a preemptive “sorry”.

what words to you say strangely?

Brian and I decided to write our own vows this time. Thought I’d post them here.

Brian’s:

You have been part of my greatest moments of joy and my deepest pain.   I am grateful for the experience of both because of who I have become.  Today I am a stronger, better person because you are part of my life.  I am so thankful that our story has turned out better than so many.  I am so eager to see where our journey will take us over the next 30 years.  My prayer is that God would use our story to help hundreds of other people find their way back to God and restore broken relationships.

I intend to grow old, bald, wrinkly and wobbly with you (Lucky for you, I’ve pretty much already accomplished that).  I will strive to put your needs above my own.  I will cherish the busy, chaotic, stressful and challenging times with you by my side.  I will relish the times of relaxation, solitude, and pleasure with you.  I will always share my deepest fears and grandest dreams with you.  When I feel like shutting you out, I will embrace you and trust you with my heart.

When you are wounded, I will pick you up.  When you are joyful I will celebrate with you.  When you are scared I will embrace you.  When you feel lonely, I will hold you.  When you are threatened I will protect you.

I will do my best to seek God first in my life so I can be the spiritual leader you deserve. I will love you and only you.  I will always choose you!

Mine:

Well… obviously the first time I did this, it didn’t take so well. In fact, I don’t even remember what I said the first time around because I was so nervous and distracted from Renee losing the ring.

However, that was 9 years ago… and I’ve learned a lot since then. I still hate that it took the failure of our original marriage to realize my misguided understanding of what it takes to make our marriage a success… but I’m humbled and grateful for this second chance most couples don’t get to see OR experience.

So… for the next 99 years:
Instead of waiting for you to pick up your socks, I’ll just do it. I’m closer to the ground anyway.
Instead of kicking you when you’re snoring, I’ll just put earplugs in.
Instead of assuming what you didn’t say, I’ll ask you about your thoughts.
Instead of reading INTO what you DID say, I’ll take you for face value.
Instead of looking for what’s wrong, I’ll seek out all that’s right.
Instead of shouting to be heard, I’ll stop and listen.
Instead of waiting to be pursued, I’ll intentionally pursue you
Instead of justifying my wrongs, I’ll humbly say “I’m Sorry!”
Instead of looking to another man to determine my value, I’ll choose to see YOUR value.

Brian, now that I finally know what it means to love, I vow to not only love and respect you with all that God has created me with… but I promise to seek out God’s desires for me… for US, often and consistently. I promise to love our children unconditionally and raise them to love God and love others. I will teach them how to extend grace and compassion by example… by the example God revealed to me through you in my biggest failings.

I vow to see you and only YOU till I can’t see anymore. I promise to listen carefully for God’s promptings till my future hearing aids are merely ear jewelry. I promise to love you till I breathe my last breath. And I vow to never forget the second chance God gave me… gave us… to prove that His REDEMPTION is real in a broken and hurting world. And finally, I promise to remember God’s desire and PURPOSE for us.

He chose us for one word and action: Restoration.

Here are some photos (I’ll post more later) from when this weekend so far by Joshua (well, I took the photo of the boys, one was from Brent and one was from Crystal’s camera).

Diane & David Goodwin, Cathi Stegall, Crystal Renaud, Tammy Hodge, me, Mark Stegall.
Joshua White, Brent Hodge, Brian Clayville

Us and David & Diane Goodwin. David stood as Brian’s Best Man.

Renee Wong, Lynse Stevens, Diane Goodwin, Crystal Renaud, Rose Braun, Angela Lawton, me, Tammy Hodge, Cathi Stegall, Mikey Sison, Allison McKenney & Helen Wong (soon-to-be-Taylor).

This photo holds my heart: Renee Mytar, Jason Mytar, Tyler Braun, Rose Braun, Allison McKenney, Chad Stevens, Crystal Renaud, Lynse Stevens, Gary Jon Walleson, Angela Lawton, me, Brian,          David Goodwin, Diane Goodwin, Helen Wong (soon-to-be-Taylor), Jesse Taylor, Mikey Sison, Tammy Hodge, Brent Hodge, Cathi Stegall & Mark Stegall.

God is good… all the time!

—————

Some of my friends’ write-ups:
David Goodwin
Tammy Hodge
Mark Stegall