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Vow Renewal

May 23, 2010 in Adultery, Family, Friends, Life Experience, Marriage, Photography with 47 Comments

This weekend, Brian and I got to publically redeem our marriage with 30 of our closest friends and family members.

Brian and I decided to write our own vows this time. Thought I’d post them here.

Brian’s:

You have been part of my greatest moments of joy and my deepest pain.   I am grateful for the experience of both because of who I have become.  Today I am a stronger, better person because you are part of my life.  I am so thankful that our story has turned out better than so many.  I am so eager to see where our journey will take us over the next 30 years.  My prayer is that God would use our story to help hundreds of other people find their way back to God and restore broken relationships.

I intend to grow old, bald, wrinkly and wobbly with you (Lucky for you, I’ve pretty much already accomplished that).  I will strive to put your needs above my own.  I will cherish the busy, chaotic, stressful and challenging times with you by my side.  I will relish the times of relaxation, solitude, and pleasure with you.  I will always share my deepest fears and grandest dreams with you.  When I feel like shutting you out, I will embrace you and trust you with my heart.

When you are wounded, I will pick you up.  When you are joyful I will celebrate with you.  When you are scared I will embrace you.  When you feel lonely, I will hold you.  When you are threatened I will protect you.

I will do my best to seek God first in my life so I can be the spiritual leader you deserve. I will love you and only you.  I will always choose you!

Mine:

Well… obviously the first time I did this, it didn’t take so well. In fact, I don’t even remember what I said the first time around because I was so nervous and distracted from Renee losing the ring.

However, that was 9 years ago… and I’ve learned a lot since then. I still hate that it took the failure of our original marriage to realize my misguided understanding of what it takes to make our marriage a success… but I’m humbled and grateful for this second chance most couples don’t get to see OR experience.

So… for the next 99 years:
Instead of waiting for you to pick up your socks, I’ll just do it. I’m closer to the ground anyway.
Instead of kicking you when you’re snoring, I’ll just put earplugs in.
Instead of assuming what you didn’t say, I’ll ask you about your thoughts.
Instead of reading INTO what you DID say, I’ll take you for face value.
Instead of looking for what’s wrong, I’ll seek out all that’s right.
Instead of shouting to be heard, I’ll stop and listen.
Instead of waiting to be pursued, I’ll intentionally pursue you
Instead of justifying my wrongs, I’ll humbly say “I’m Sorry!”
Instead of looking to another man to determine my value, I’ll choose to see YOUR value.

Brian, now that I finally know what it means to love, I vow to not only love and respect you with all that God has created me with… but I promise to seek out God’s desires for me… for US, often and consistently. I promise to love our children unconditionally and raise them to love God and love others. I will teach them how to extend grace and compassion by example… by the example God revealed to me through you in my biggest failings.

I vow to see you and only YOU till I can’t see anymore. I promise to listen carefully for God’s promptings till my future hearing aids are merely ear jewelry. I promise to love you till I breathe my last breath. And I vow to never forget the second chance God gave me… gave us… to prove that His REDEMPTION is real in a broken and hurting world. And finally, I promise to remember God’s desire and PURPOSE for us.

He chose us for one word and action: Restoration.

Here are some photos (I’ll post more later) from when this weekend so far by Joshua (well, I took the photo of the boys, one was from Brent and one was from Crystal’s camera).

Diane & David Goodwin, Cathi Stegall, Crystal Renaud, Tammy Hodge, me, Mark Stegall.
Joshua White, Brent Hodge, Brian Clayville

Us and David & Diane Goodwin. David stood as Brian’s Best Man.

Renee Wong, Lynse Stevens, Diane Goodwin, Crystal Renaud, Rose Braun, Angela Lawton, me, Tammy Hodge, Cathi Stegall, Mikey Sison, Allison McKenney & Helen Wong (soon-to-be-Taylor).

This photo holds my heart: Renee Mytar, Jason Mytar, Tyler Braun, Rose Braun, Allison McKenney, Chad Stevens, Crystal Renaud, Lynse Stevens, Gary Jon Walleson, Angela Lawton, me, Brian, David Goodwin, Diane Goodwin, Helen Wong (soon-to-be-Taylor), Jesse Taylor, Mikey Sison, Tammy Hodge, Brent Hodge, Cathi Stegall & Mark Stegall.

God is good… all the time!

—————

Some of my friends’ write-ups:
David Goodwin
Tammy Hodge
Mark Stegall

Christmas Cards

December 12, 2009 in Family, Motherhood, Photography with 14 Comments

I have to be honest.

I was never a “snail mail” type of person. I didn’t send birthday cards or “thinking of you” letters on a regular basis. I was always shocked when I would receive cards or gifts in the mail because I would literally think, “WHO DOES THIS?”

Well… In September 2005, I had Chance. He was only 3 months old when Christmas came around. My good friend, Janet, said, “When am I gonna get YOUR Christmas card?”

Me: “I don’t do Christmas cards!”
J: “WHAT? You HAVE to. You have a baby now. Everyone wants to see your baby in card form.”
Me: “What? Is this a mother rule.”
J: “Yes. Welcome to motherhood.”
Me: “But Christmas is a week and a half away!”
J: “Well… you better hurry then.”

Yes. This was a real conversation and yes… this sounds like MOST of Janet and my conversations. Imagine Gilmore Girls banter… that’s the kind of banter Janet and I have. It’s real, honest, revealing and efficient. With Janet, I don’t feel like I have to do the whole fluffy, “How are you doing, feeling, smelling…” ritual that most people do. That’s how we roll.

So, home I went. I loaded the cutest photo of Chance I could find (taken by my sister Renee) and sent it off to Costco Photo to make 100 or so Christmas cards. It was a last minute thing, but I received SO many comments over it, I knew Janet was right. This began my “once-a-year” snail mail project.

Five years later… I find myself LOVING the opportunity to mail out a picture card to my friends and family once a year. It’s a way to update AND let them know I’m thinking about them. I don’t use a label maker for outgoing addresses. No… I handwrite every single address, and pray over the family of which we are sending the card to while I write. I also know some friends keep my card up on their fridge all year long and pray for us daily.

This years’ family photos and card was taken/created by Kimberly Whipps with Barefoot Photography. Kimberly made ours last year too… and I’m pretty certain she’ll most likely be creating ours next year… and the year after that.

Not only is Kimberly our photographer, but she’s a dear friend with the most humorous personality (y’all know how I love that). She knows our story… she knows how our family almost fell apart. So, this year, she used her amazingly creative & artistic eye to capture what God has saved in Brian and my marriage. She helped reveal a family experiencing restoration. She captured REAL moments (which is pretty amazing since our kids are ON THE GO).

If you’re in the Portland, Oregon area, and have always wondered about where to get some awesome family photos (or Christmas cards)… Kimberly’s my vote. She’s my girl.

Merry Christmas, everyone… and may you ALL remember WHO we celebrate this season.

Because of Jesus, we can TRULY experience faith, hope and love.

These words have never rung more true to me.

Love IS Greater Than

August 19, 2009 in Family, Friends, Photography with 0 Comments

As you may have known… our friend, Joshua, stayed with us for a week a couple of weeks ago.

Gregg & Sandy came out soon after that (Gregg & Josh are a team and were out here to shoot a wedding in Bend) and we soon introduced them to SUSHI at LeHana. I can confidently say that their lives are forever changed for the better.

Anyway… one night, Josh & Gregg took us out for a photo shoot. You know me… I’m ALWAYS game to have someone help me with capturing a moment in our lives. I posted some of those pictures on THIS PREVIOUS POST. Later in the week, Josh also let me talk him into a mini-shoot in the daylight. You’ll see what I mean. The first shoot was mostly in the dark.

Love Is Greater Than Photography is located in Toledo, Ohio… so if you’re around there… I would HIGHLY recommend you use them. You will NOT be sorry!

These guys are amazing photographers, but even better friends. Though I wouldn’t mind having either of them around all the time as my families personal paparazzi, I would rather take their friendship. I would not trade real friendship like this for anything. Thank you, Josh, Gregg & Sandy for the privilege of being your friends. I am blessed.

Now… Get ready to experience some serious awesomeness!

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Oh… and just for fun. Here are some from when Brent & Tam were here:

The Good & The Bad of This Week

August 3, 2009 in Chance, Family, Friends, Motherhood, Paxton, Photography, Worship, Worship Confessional with 6 Comments

So, as I said… this past week has been really busy in good and bad ways. I thought I’d just list them to keep it simple.

Good: I came home from a girls weekend from the beach. So nice to be with women who know my junk and still love me in spite of it all.
Bad: As fun as it was, put me behind on housework.
Good: Josh was here last week (he rocks and is SO much fun!)
Good: Went berry picking with Rose, Janet & Abby (and my kids, of course). Haven’t done that since I was a kid.
Bad: Granger Lam, my sweet friend from High School, died at the young age of 30, leaving behind his 5 year old little girl.
Good: Finally met Gregg, Sandy and Dylan Hart (my sweet Twitter friends that MAILED me Thin Mints).
Good: Hiked Multnomah Falls with the Hart’s, Josh & Steph (ok, not Josh & Steph… dorks)
Good: Photo shoot with Josh & Gregg (aka Love Is Greater Photography). Here are 3 samplers from our shoot:

So… seriously… I’m really over having bad news infiltrate my life. I would like for things to even out again. My heart can’t take it. It can’t take:

the brokenness of good friends’ marriages.
the hurt life leaves on those I love.
the hurt those I love leave on me (whether they are aware of it or not).
news another friend has been in another accident.
news another friend died.

That’s all I have brain-room to post about right now. I’m “good & bad”-ed out. Mentally exhausted. I’m gonna go watch a movie with my honey.

50 Pics Friday

May 23, 2009 in Family, Friends, Photography, twitter with 2 Comments

For some reason… I thought I would be blogging more than I have been this week with Crystal in town and all. Apparently, I DO enjoy real life time with my friends more than blogging or twittering.

The Hodges, Brent, Tammy, Kass & Kota, just rolled into town too… so it’s a full house for the next few days and I’m beyond thrilled.

I’ll post more soon… but for now, here’s my 50 pictures marking today:

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