This weekend, Brian and I got to publically redeem our marriage with 30 of our closest friends and family members.
Brian and I decided to write our own vows this time. Thought I’d post them here.
Brian’s:
You have been part of my greatest moments of joy and my deepest pain. I am grateful for the experience of both because of who I have become. Today I am a stronger, better person because you are part of my life. I am so thankful that our story has turned out better than so many. I am so eager to see where our journey will take us over the next 30 years. My prayer is that God would use our story to help hundreds of other people find their way back to God and restore broken relationships.
I intend to grow old, bald, wrinkly and wobbly with you (Lucky for you, I’ve pretty much already accomplished that). I will strive to put your needs above my own. I will cherish the busy, chaotic, stressful and challenging times with you by my side. I will relish the times of relaxation, solitude, and pleasure with you. I will always share my deepest fears and grandest dreams with you. When I feel like shutting you out, I will embrace you and trust you with my heart.
When you are wounded, I will pick you up. When you are joyful I will celebrate with you. When you are scared I will embrace you. When you feel lonely, I will hold you. When you are threatened I will protect you.
I will do my best to seek God first in my life so I can be the spiritual leader you deserve. I will love you and only you. I will always choose you!
Mine:
Well… obviously the first time I did this, it didn’t take so well. In fact, I don’t even remember what I said the first time around because I was so nervous and distracted from Renee losing the ring.
However, that was 9 years ago… and I’ve learned a lot since then. I still hate that it took the failure of our original marriage to realize my misguided understanding of what it takes to make our marriage a success… but I’m humbled and grateful for this second chance most couples don’t get to see OR experience.
So… for the next 99 years:
Instead of waiting for you to pick up your socks, I’ll just do it. I’m closer to the ground anyway.
Instead of kicking you when you’re snoring, I’ll just put earplugs in.
Instead of assuming what you didn’t say, I’ll ask you about your thoughts.
Instead of reading INTO what you DID say, I’ll take you for face value.
Instead of looking for what’s wrong, I’ll seek out all that’s right.
Instead of shouting to be heard, I’ll stop and listen.
Instead of waiting to be pursued, I’ll intentionally pursue you
Instead of justifying my wrongs, I’ll humbly say “I’m Sorry!”
Instead of looking to another man to determine my value, I’ll choose to see YOUR value.Brian, now that I finally know what it means to love, I vow to not only love and respect you with all that God has created me with… but I promise to seek out God’s desires for me… for US, often and consistently. I promise to love our children unconditionally and raise them to love God and love others. I will teach them how to extend grace and compassion by example… by the example God revealed to me through you in my biggest failings.
I vow to see you and only YOU till I can’t see anymore. I promise to listen carefully for God’s promptings till my future hearing aids are merely ear jewelry. I promise to love you till I breathe my last breath. And I vow to never forget the second chance God gave me… gave us… to prove that His REDEMPTION is real in a broken and hurting world. And finally, I promise to remember God’s desire and PURPOSE for us.
He chose us for one word and action: Restoration.
Here are some photos (I’ll post more later) from when this weekend so far by Joshua (well, I took the photo of the boys, one was from Brent and one was from Crystal’s camera).
Diane & David Goodwin, Cathi Stegall, Crystal Renaud, Tammy Hodge, me, Mark Stegall.
Joshua White, Brent Hodge, Brian Clayville
Us and David & Diane Goodwin. David stood as Brian’s Best Man.
Renee Wong, Lynse Stevens, Diane Goodwin, Crystal Renaud, Rose Braun, Angela Lawton, me, Tammy Hodge, Cathi Stegall, Mikey Sison, Allison McKenney & Helen Wong (soon-to-be-Taylor).
This photo holds my heart: Renee Mytar, Jason Mytar, Tyler Braun, Rose Braun, Allison McKenney, Chad Stevens, Crystal Renaud, Lynse Stevens, Gary Jon Walleson, Angela Lawton, me, Brian, David Goodwin, Diane Goodwin, Helen Wong (soon-to-be-Taylor), Jesse Taylor, Mikey Sison, Tammy Hodge, Brent Hodge, Cathi Stegall & Mark Stegall.
God is good… all the time!
—————
Some of my friends’ write-ups:
David Goodwin
Tammy Hodge
Mark Stegall
My heart is full of happy. Love you both so much and am so privileged to be along for the ride.
we’re so glad you’re a part of lives. seriously. thankful!
So awesome.
Is it just me or is it hilarious that in the first pic the girls have “hand fulls” and the dudes have their hands between their legs….Oh the irony of marriage…BWAHAHAHAHA.
Congrats….again.
Thanks for taking us along!
i know, right? hahahaha! there were a million more inappropriate ones but we thought we’d save everyone from them.
My wedding gift is for continued prayers for you both and for your family. Love you guys so much!
that is the PERFECT wedding gift. thank you, melinda.
sweet. congrats. He redeems refreshes & renews.
That is so great! Thank you for sharing. Your vow renewal is one of two examples of God’s redemptive power at work that I had the privilege to witness this weekend (albeit yours was from a distance). Both stories remind me that God is so good, beyond our measure to even comprehend. I am reminded that when it feels like everything has been taken from us or we have broken things beyond repair, God is present to redeem all of it. Your story brings me such joy and such hope. Thank you for giving us all the opportunity to share in this journey with you. Hugs and much love to you both.
God IS good!!!
Thanks for sharing your day with your internet community! I missed the tweet about ustream until it was too late. Oh, well. The tweets & you post today cover it! What an awesome story. No more guilt. No more shame. Only love.
Yours is truly a story of redemption and grace. Thank you for being so transparent about it all.
May the path you have walked and will walk in the future be a blessing to others. Congratulations on the renewal of your vows!
Looooooooooooove! Have a great week!
These pictures are so joyful…so full of promise. Very glad this day came for all of you…after journeying through the desert this weekend to Scott and Daylon’s memorial, this is like a cool, sweet drink of water.
Love to you. Peace to you. Blessings to you.
And thank YOU for being a part of our renewal. Thought of you guys multiple times on this day. And everytime I look at the pictures with my dress, I’ll think of you… and thank God.
You guys are such a blessing to us! Thank you!
Thank you for having the courage to share your story with so many – and thank you for the hope that it is bringing to them… and to me.
Congrats on the renewal! I know that God is already blessing this renewed commitment, and will continue to do so.
Enjoy that 2nd honeymoon!
thanks, jennifer!
i’m not sure if it was courage or if it was just being tired of hiding in secret… but whichever way… God is good!
I have tears reading this. Many, many tears. I sooo get the importance of this day. Jesse and I have been talking about doing the same thing. For the same reasons. I’m pretty sure we will next year.
I love you so much. And I love your heart. I feel so blessed to know you.
you SHOULD next year.
it’s amazing. it was seriously one of the best days of my life. top 3 for sure!
You are beautiful, your vows were raw & incredible! I am so deeply proud of you my friend & and so thankful that you & Brian had this incredible opportunity! God IS good & I am so happy for you both!
Love you! xoxo
i love you, sweet friend! thank you for all your prayers and support this whole time. i’m so thankful for our friendship that has proven to withstand the test of time!
I am so thankful that we got to enjoy this weekend together and with so many great friends. We are so blessed, now it’s time to go out and bless others.
Love You!
i love you, babe. you bless me every day with your grace and forgiveness. thank you for letting me share this day with you.
I love you guys.
Seriously… something fierce.
love YOU…
… if words could only express…
Congratulations! You two make a cute couple. But then, you know this. Thanks for not only taking this journey and sharing it so openly.
so very happy for you both!
fiercely, fiercely loved!
i will never ever forget this day.
thank you for letting us be a part of it.
i love you, jenni and brian. so much.
you bless me. you bless us with your presence.
and before you make a joke out of that… i really mean it.
you’ve been present from day one. from the moment all hell broke loose. you were there. loving, encouraging, praying and not casting any judgment. just love.
you are treasured… and we are blessed to be in your presence, Tammitha.
my heart is still at the ‘just about to burst’ place in my chest.
i just am totally in love with how you both conquered the enemy in this. stay strong. im sure he’s pissed.
see. no jokes from me.
not for another week at least til all this mush passes.
It was a great weekend indeed! Thanks for letting us be a part of it! We really did enjoy ourselves and had a few great laughs while we were at it.
Here’s to making more memories…
P.S. Renee “Wong” (already-became Mytar).
Thanks for having us!
of course. couldn’t have imagined this weekend without you.
sweetness!
Gosh my heart us still bursting with joy from the weekend. Love you so freaking much!
don’t leave me.
“Instead of looking to another man to determine my value, I’ll choose to see YOUR value”
This phrase broke me then and it breaks me now. Even from the first day of this horrible process, you loved each other. I saw it then and I se it now. these words speak power and healing!
I love you guys and I am so proud of you two!!!
love you too, dear friend.
you’ve been constant and loving. we are thankful for you. you have NO clue how thankful we are!
Incredible vows. The story that God is writing through both of you is inspiring and incredible.
Congratulations to both of you!!!
thank you. we are humbled by that… always.
Umm I need a kleenex. Congratulations you two love birds. The photos beautiful. The vows even more.
speaking of… i just ran out of kleenex. to the store we go!
Oh what a blessing blessing blessing blessing!! Thank you for being such an inspiration. Love to you both – from across the country!
girl… love coming right back at your FACE!!!
hugs, by sweet pinata.
Your story always touches me. I got a little teary, just looking at these pictures. Congratulations and best wishes!
Thanks, Chrissy!
Life is such a journey. We definitely get to choose which path we go down.
Were’s the “Like” button on here??
I’m so happy for you guys. God is good!